a_shadow: (Zoom)
Agent Texas ([personal profile] a_shadow) wrote 2025-04-02 08:17 pm (UTC)

1. I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle

2. I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS

3. The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome

4. Next time you're in town we should fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.

5. Text her!

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