a_shadow: (Pleased)
Agent Texas ([personal profile] a_shadow) wrote 2017-07-07 08:28 pm (UTC)

1. You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.

2. sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.

3. see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it

4. My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss

5. Text her!

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